Benson's Emotions are Part of a Drive for Perfection

STILLWATER – Oklahoma State players had made it to the visiting locker room last Saturday at Mountain America Stadium with a 27-15 win over Arizona State. The defense had shut out the Sun Devils offense in the second half. The players were all on a knee in the open space listening to head coach Mike Gundy make his post game comments before the team would sing the fight song as they do after all wins. There on the front row was starting weakside linebacker Xavier Benson listening intently, but tears rolling down his face. Benson has been open about his emotions and sometimes, over emotions. I couldn’t help myself from looking at him and wondering what his emotions were. 

The good thing is that Benson has become an open book. He shares his mental outlook and feelings with the intent that his doing that can help other players, other people that can be hyper emotional. 

Monday after practice, I had to ask, why the tears in the winning locker room?

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Benson is more of an open book with the media this season.

“I’m never satisfied. I want it to be perfect. I’m a perfectionist,” Benson said of his emotions. “If it is not … It’s not disappointment, it’s just me being me. I don’t know how to explain it. I’m okay, but it is just that my heart is in it. You know when somebody has their heart in it, it’s just hard when you feel you could have done better.”

Benson had five tackles overall, three unassisted, and half a tackle for loss. In two games he has nine tackles. It’s not enough. He wants to do more.

“It means something to everybody out here and we have been doing this for 8-to-10 months and it is like they gave all the respect to Arizona State and they gave out all their best schemes on offense and we withstood it. It was like time for us to adapt and get over the hill.”

Benson has to adjust his thinking as the Bryan Nardo defensive system is not a straight “see ball, get ball” scheme. Players have responsibilities, but they are kept relatively simple to allow the “runners and hitters’ them of the Nardo defense. Benson may crave more, but he needs to play within the system. Too much can be too much.

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Benson with a tackle in the opener against Central Arkansas.

“Not satisfied because we can always be better,” Benson said staying the course with his approach. “That is what we want to do. We want to be number one and there is no settling. I feel where we are starting out is elite, but that we can be a lot better.”

Benson has two really talented players beside him. He has known fellow Pleasant Grove High School standout Nick Martin from playing with Nick’s older brother in Texarkana. Martin has said he looks up to Benson. There is also the conversion of ultra-talented former edge rusher Colin Oliver to sam linebacker. Benson has helped with that and sees what we all do, incredible potential for Oliver and what he can do for the defense.

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Oliver gets a sack at Arizona State.

“He’s doing really well, and he is just getting used to being comfortable out thate,” Benson said of Oliver, who improved dramatically from game one to game two. “It is a different spacing and leveling because you are not on the line of scrimmage, but five-yards off and sometimes you have a different apex in that you are out there with a receiver. Then sometimes you are in a run fit. It comes down to seeing the things you need to see over and over again. I think he is taking all that information really well.”

Benson can’t promise those tears will be gone. He professes that he is, who he is. He’s on much more solid footing now, but football will always be an emotional experience for Xavier Benson, so just understand he can’t hold those emotions in. It is who he is.